strike me down with all of your hatred
by alaskanbirdfriend
Summary: In the end, Palpatine doesn't tell Rey what will happen if she takes his life. So she kills him. And the emperor gets what he wants - for a moment. (SPOILERS FOR THE RISE OF SKYWALKER)


She wants to say the darkness feels slimy, unwelcoming, unfriendly. An antithesis to what she is, to what she always will be.

Instead, it feels like a shroud. Ushering her in, welcoming her into its realm. Like it knows her, inside and out.

Rey wants to vomit.

The statues-whether they are ancient Sith or depictions of the emperor-loom over her. They don't watch, eyes ironically closed, but they do wait. Everlasting, patient, and unendingly _sinister_.

Her footsteps crunch against the stone, echoing through the silent abyss. She feels carved out, hollow. Like she's walking to her doom.

_No, _a voice whispers inside her. Through all the fear she feels enveloped in, the voice is the strongest. _You know why you're here._

The image of her lightsaber-_Luke's and his father's before him_-through the emperor's chest is enough to push her forward. The cold doesn't seem to sap her strength any longer-instead, it hardens her.

_Go, _the voice says. _Do it._

Rey picks up her pace slightly, swallowing. Her hands sweat, and she nearly drops the lightsaber. She shoves it back onto her belt unceremoniously and marches forward.

The chamber… it's _huge, _there's no other way to put it. She almost wants to stand there and just take it all in-take in the _enormity_ of what rests on this planet.

But she turns, and there's the throne. The one that has haunted her sleep, leaving her shaking and cold when she wakes.

Surrounded by spikes and carved out of stone. It chills her to the bone.

_This is the one-_

_-where she saw-_

_-Ben-_

_-and her-_

_-sitting on the throne._

She shudders, moving closer, wary. It's silent-

No. Wait.

Chanting. Chanting fills the room, low and ominous and she knows something-

No, someone.

Someone is coming.

A shadow, hovering in the air and hung up by a mechanical arm, lowers itself slowly down, staying about a foot above the ground. Its clawed hands are clutched to its chest, eyes dull and grey. A sickening grin, filled with decaying teeth, stretches across the monster's face. She stumbles backward.

There's an endless cavern behind her, but she feels like she's a step away from toppling off a cliff.

The creature opens its mouth, opens its arms in a disgustingly welcoming manner, and speaks with an all too familiar voice. _One that has raked his fingers across her mind, left her trembling in a cold sweat after another quickly fading nightmare._

"My dear," it says, too kindly, too gentle. Something inside her is screaming and begging her to run, while another part just says _stay. Finish it. _"Grandchild. I have been waiting for you for a long, _long_ time."

Rey swallows, taking in the decrepit body. She locks eyes with his faded ones, despite every instinct telling her not to. "You killed my parents." Her voice sounds hollow.

The grin curls downwards into a sneer, broken fingers of bone knitting together unpleasantly. "They were _weak, _girl_._" Then he smiles again, his rotted teeth on full display. "But not you. Oh, no. You were strong, far stronger than I had expected. But your parents…"

He trails off, scowling as he places his hands flat against each other in a contemplating manner. "They did not see the truth."

A burst of anger ignites inside her. She stands her ground. "They rescued me," She spits, hands clenching into fists. "From _you._"

The emperor pauses. For a second she thinks she's had him. Then he laughs, long and loud, head back and cackling. "Me?" He raises a pitying eyebrow at her. "Without _me,_" He snarls. "_You _would be nothing. A scavenger girl with no name, no home, _no one._"

She knows, she _knows _she had family who loved her, truly loved her-but the words crush something deep inside her. Her eyes water and she steps back. She can't-she can't do this.

The emperor watches her gleefully, the mechanical arm behind him moving his body closer. Nausea grips her stomach, her hand fumbling for the clip holding the lightsaber onto her belt.

It tumbles into her hands, and she holds it up to the side, presenting a clear warning.

The emperor's smirk is sly. "You can't kill me, _girl_." His eyes move to the lightsaber handle, and her arms tremble. "Join me, and you will rule the galaxy… as its Empress," he croons, and he moves back as his arm stretches out to the throne.

It pulls, a darkness that pulses throughout the chamber, beckoning her closer. But she won't. She can't.

The lightsaber clicks on, humming in its intensity, a bright blue that sears her visions and blazes in the darkness of the pit. She glares and sets her stance.

The emperor draws his arm back in with a scowl, face twisting with hatred. "So be it," he snarls, lifting his arms, ready to strike and-

There's a lightsaber through his chest.

He gasps, and the blade clicks off, leaving them in the shadows. There's a deep well of satisfaction building up inside her-_finally, finally, he's dead_-

The emperor chuckles, and she freezes. _What-_

_Finally, _the voice whispers, and the emperor dies, his body dissolving into nothing.

She stumbles back, fear making her breathe quicker and quicker, she doesn't know _what's happening_, why-

Ben appears in front of her, surrounded… by the Knights of Ren. She has to-she has to-

Rey nearly throws the lightsaber in his face, too caught up with terror and uncertainty and confusion of what's going on. There's a darkness cloaking her, surrounding her, and _what's going on-_

Ben catches the weapon, surprise evident on his face as he watches her, but begins to decimate the Knights.

"_Your eyes-_" he seems to say, but the vision flickers away, and something settles in her body, clenches around her heart, her lungs, _she can't breathe-_

She relaxes, straightening upwards and flexing her hands, looking down at them. So agile. So unlike the bony, decaying fingers she was so used to. What a… pleasant feeling.

_What? She can't-there's something wrong-with her-she needs to-get out-fingers?-fingers-no, her hands were always fine-what's going _on-

She rolls her shoulders, turning away from the throne to face the… audience she had prepared earlier. "And now… " She spreads her arms out, grinning. "We may begi-"

A figure jumps in through the opening of the roof, landing on a chain with an '_ow'. Who…? _It drops to the floor, igniting a blue lightsaber and sprinting towards her.

She drops her arms, pulling out her second lightsaber and frowning in irritation. The _idiot _Kylo Ren, come to save Rey again? She sneers.

_No, Ben-don't come-I-the emperor-Palpatine-he-I-we-_

"_Boy…_ you have no hope of defeating me," she growls, and Kylo Ren falters, slowing as he reaches her. His face pales.

"How…" He steps back, his lightsaber held in front of him. "You." His eyes fill with rage, pointing the blade at her. The Force roils around him. "_How?!_"

She tilts her head, a smile at the edge of her lips. "The dark side of the force is a pathway to many abilities, some considered to be… unnatural."

Kylo Ren snarls in response, going in for the attack. It's an easy block, both hands on her lightsaber, distaste filling her expression. She wants this to be over and _done with_.

_She doesn't want to fight-please-that's all she wants-she wants to be free-wants to rest-please-_

He leaps away, then slashes back at her, grazing against her arm. She hisses, whether from pain or anger, she doesn't care. It doesn't matter.

And so the fight begins.

* * *

Kylo Ren-trained by Snoke-is surprisingly… _good. _It fills her with irritation… but also a sense of pride. But the boy must die. He's detrimental to her plans, and a _Jedi, _no less_. _Scum.

He dodges another blow and she growls.

"What are you fighting for, _boy? _Insipid dreams? Useless ideologies? You could have ruled the _galaxy!_" She roars, and he just jumps out of the way of her lightsaber, glaring.

"No," He says, determined. "I would have been your attack dog, at _best_. I would have been a puppet. You have _nothing_," he snarls. "that I want."

She throws her lightsaber and misses, spinning around in a circle. Her eyes glimmer with hatred. "_So be it._"

* * *

She's breathing heavily, but she's got him cornered. Kylo Ren is also clutching at a wound to his side, so-a bonus. Fury burns in his eyes, but-he's not lashing out? She looks to his blue lightsaber, hanging at his side in his hand, then smirks.

"Going to die a Jedi, then? How brave." She steps forward and clicks the lightsaber on. It flashes a bright blue, then pierces through his chest, burning a hole in the wall behind him. "How _weak,_" she sneers, and moves to step away.

And-

-there's-

_-hole-_

_-her chest-_

"_I'm sorry," _Ben wheezes, and collapses to the ground. She coughs-

_-she can't-_

_-Ben-_

Rey falls to her knees, then to the floor.

She forces her eyes to shift over to his body-_she killed him, she can't breathe, she's so, so sorry-_

"Ben," she chokes out. He's not moving-_nonononononono-_

He tilts his head towards her, eyelids fluttering. She needs to-_she needs to tell him-_

"_Thank you,_" she whispers, searching his expression for-_anything_.

He nods, breathing out one last time, and his body fades away, his clothes dropping into empty air.

Rey's head drops back, and her eyes close.

And there is peace.


End file.
